When I was drinking—I lived far from self-compassion. Drinking was a kind of punishment I gave myself for failing, not measuring up in parenting, yelling too much and being lazy.

Self-compassion seemed out of reach, and yet when I learned how to embrace it in sobriety, it became a freeing practice.

Many of us have been conditioned for many years to be compassionate to others but not to share that type of grace with ourselves.

This conditioning can manifest as self-induced limiting beliefs or a desire to achieve and succeed so great that practicing self-compassion can seem weak. 

I hear similar stories within my community + in coaching sessions a great deal.

We all try things, and when they don't go how we like them to, we label ourselves failures. Wow! This type of critical babble can be so mean + it's become habitually normal for many women—especially women who are stuck in the alcohol cycle.  

These short, easy steps below will help when you need to lean into self-compassion and grace a little more. 

1. Accept Yourself: Remember to have some space for grace for what you are doing. I urge you to focus on your exceptional qualities and accept those unique things about you. They make you, YOU! 

2. Pause for Self-Awareness: Pause to notice how you talk to yourself and try switching it up. Talk to yourself like you would someone you love, a baby, or your pets. Our inner critic is one hot mess and can bring us down if we let her rule all of our thoughts. 

3. Focus on What You Are Doing: Spend more time noticing everything you are doing and all your hard work—even the most minor things matter. One exercise I give my clients who struggle with seeing all they are doing is to take a few minutes each night and switch their focus from all they didn't get done to all they DID do. Write down those 5-10 items that you did get done. (Deep breaths, flossing, + showers count)

4. Believe in Yourself: Let's not dispute the fact that you are magnificent. You are a unique soul with so much to give this world. This means having faith in your capabilities. You can do so much more when you believe in your abilities, which helps you overcome self-doubt. 

Like this post? Let me know below!

xxHeidi